I Am An Addict

I am an addict. Normally you would hear this sentence at Addict Discussion meetings. I don't want to have to be a person who goes to those meetings but I am content with the idea of spreading to the world that I am an addict, it is something I have problems with every day, I fight so hard and sometimes I lose and other times I don't. Some people think that addicts are weak, that they should be able to control themselves, but when you lose control completely it is so hard to regain it that so often it is easier just to not. When a person decides they can't handle not having control anymore it takes every ounce of strength to fight against their problem. I am an addict, I can't change this fact, I will always be an addict, what I can do is try to learn from it and avoid my addictions. I say addictions because there are a lot of them. Everybody is different right? I am the sort of person who gets addicted to things so easily it isn't even funny, I never started drinking, or smoking, or taking other types of drugs because I knew that if I had I wouldn't have been able to stop. Things are not as simple as stopping being addicted to something though, you can make the choice but still find yourself failing over and over and every time you fail it just makes you depressed and when you are depressed you just want to do your addiction because for a little moment it makes you feel better. I am an addict and this is my truth and now I will be fighting it with everything I have because I hate that I am an addict.

God guide you always,
NL