Today was my day to sign on at the Jobcentre, I hate this process it is and probably always will be my idea of hell. While I was there I prayed to God that he would give me the strength to be there and to face the people who don't really care who you are or what you want. I hate the time I spend there being told I am not good enough, being told I should be trying harder, but I guess it doesn't matter because no matter how hard I have tried in the past I feel as though I should just give up. Nobody really wants to employ me, probably just because I lack experience, of course if I can't get a job I can't get any experience so why bother? The only thing that is keeping me going is my faith in God and my faith that he will provide something for me before I lose myself to the depressing in and out motion of the jobcentre hell. Today I was given a 'test' to do to say whether I am eligible for a job, I failed the part that was claimed to be 'easy' and passed the 'hard' parts, it doesn't matter anyway I failed the test so I have to take another longer one next week. The whole thing sickens me, parts of me wish that I could just vomit on the bureaucracy of it. The government is so good at making so many rules that don't make sense it doesn't realise that there isn't any point in it. I hate this stupid problematic shithole of a system but I still have to put up with it and hope that God will save me from this hell of mine.
Thanks for reading,
NL
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